randyp Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 I got all custom fitted for the latest state of the art micro-nuclear digitized hearing aids, a pair of em, at my wifes insistence, she paid for em. They came in yesterday, doctor hooked me up to his lil computer and tuned them all up. I did not know this freaking world was so noisy! They are outstanding! She even went the extra dollars and got the "Zen" program and remote for them, the zen is a soft, pleasing, sound that you can turn on or off. She axed me what the zen sounded like, I told her it sounded like an orgasm felt, I had to put hands over my ears and run fore she stold my hearing aids. You need to get that cough looked at Other Dog, I can hear you down here. randyp 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Dash Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 Congratulations. No excuses for ignoring the Missus now.Mrs Dash says I never listen, but I don't see any audio-orgasms in my future. Who gets to hold the remote? 1 Quote Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vision386 Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 WHAT? Quote Mack Truck literate. Computer illiterate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivetroad Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 STOP! Take those out of your ears!Didn't you ever see The Wrath of Khan Star Trek movie? Those are alien insect implant devices that will at the proper time relase a worm that will bury itself into your brain and control your actions.Well...............wait just a minute here. I bet you are okay, I don't think there is much left for them to bury themselves into grey matter wise?Can you download other soothing sounds on them? Like a Detroit screamin'? I at least would remove them when you sleep - the wife may send you sub-bub-lime-i-anal messages like: I really enjoy dusting furniture.I always pick up my socks.Do you want to go shoe shopping?Beer just tastes bad.Diesel fumes really stink.I think the wife needs more jewelry.I vote we go eat at that new tea room. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randyp Posted July 4, 2012 Author Share Posted July 4, 2012 I isnt worried bout aliens Olive,,,,since being I am the head poo-bah of the grand official order of the alien dragon, of wich very soon I and my compatriot insectesoids will rule all of this pitiful planet. I actually communicate with mother planet with these. on another note, i have eaten so many ribs, brauts, hot dogs,,,I may never walk again. randyp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randyp Posted July 4, 2012 Author Share Posted July 4, 2012 Congratulations. No excuses for ignoring the Missus now.Mrs Dash says I never listen, but I don't see any audio-orgasms in my future. Who gets to hold the remote?I hid it from her Jim, now I can bust a nut at the push of a lil remote button. randyp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 I hid it from her Jim, now I can bust a nut at the push of a lil remote button. randypIsn't that just a 1/2 second faster than your normal interval?If you are real quiet about "busting a nut", you can hear your testicles collapse with those supercharged aids you now sport.Rob 1 Quote Plodding along with no job nor practical application for my existence, but still trying to fix what's broke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Dash Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 I hid it from her Jim, now I can bust a nut at the push of a lil remote button. randypAnd if you listen closely, I'll bet you can hear yourself cumming coming. 2 Quote Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
other dog Posted July 4, 2012 Share Posted July 4, 2012 I got all custom fitted for the latest state of the art micro-nuclear digitized hearing aids, a pair of em, at my wifes insistence, she paid for em. They came in yesterday, doctor hooked me up to his lil computer and tuned them all up. I did not know this freaking world was so noisy! They are outstanding! She even went the extra dollars and got the "Zen" program and remote for them, the zen is a soft, pleasing, sound that you can turn on or off. She axed me what the zen sounded like, I told her it sounded like an orgasm felt, I had to put hands over my ears and run fore she stold my hearing aids. You need to get that cough looked at Other Dog, I can hear you down here. randypit's them nonfiltered Camels Quote Producer of poorly photo-chopped pictures since 1999. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Randy, Welcome to the club. I got mine two weeks ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randyp Posted July 5, 2012 Author Share Posted July 5, 2012 Randy, Welcome to the club. I got mine two weeks ago.I sure like mine David. Im hearing birds and things that I guess i been missing for years. Dern things sure were pricey, but worth it cause they do work good. Technology is amazing. I did have to tell my wife she must be at that mystery frequency, cause shes still not coming through clearly,,,LOL,,,randyp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Pricey is an understatement. Each one was more than the first new pickup I bought. I do speak much more softly now. When ever my wife says "what", I tell her she needs to have her hearing checked. It's nice to be the one saying that after hearing it for the last ten years. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 I sure like mine David. Im hearing birds and things that I guess i been missing for years. Dern things sure were pricey, but worth it cause they do work good. Technology is amazing. I did have to tell my wife she must be at that mystery frequency, cause shes still not coming through clearly,,,LOL,,,randypI need a new set of earplugs as that "shrill" sound still permeates the airwaves in my house.Of course I'm routinely accused of not being able to hear anything except the ring of a cast iron skillet at resonate frequency.Rob Quote Plodding along with no job nor practical application for my existence, but still trying to fix what's broke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 I can also tell you that your hearing is the second thing to go. I've been wearing glasses for forty years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivetroad Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 I can also tell you that your hearing is the second thing to go. I've been wearing glasses for forty years.What about #3? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Dash Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 What about #3?I wouldn't be concerned if I were you. Judging by the size of your family, I'd say wear and tear will be your downfall. 1 Quote Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mowerman Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 wow,very interesting,,congradadulations on your newlife...must be nice,,,although as you mentioned,,a little differant...bob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 What about #3?I still have a full head of hair. Just not the color it used to be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivetroad Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 I still have a full head of hair. Just not the color it used to be.Hair is my #1 thing to go - I just wondered how many years a guy has before the other problem begins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortstack Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 Don't worry about the little things Olive. It'll drive you nuts. Unless you're already there, I don't know where it'll drive you. Trey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randyp Posted July 5, 2012 Author Share Posted July 5, 2012 heh heh,,,cant beat it with a stick,,HEARING AIDS AND VIAGRA,,great inventions! randyp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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