other dog

And another

Roger was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmicks. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.

One day Roger came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that Roger claimed was actually a lie detector . It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home from school Tommy was over 2 hours late.

"Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?" asked Roger.

"Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.

The robot walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair .

"Son," said Roger, "this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school."

"We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie." said Tommy.

"What did you watch?" asked Marsha.

"The Ten Commandments ." Answered Tommy.

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair.

With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied. We really watched a movie called Sex Queen."

"I am ashamed of you son," said Roger. "When I was your age, I never lied to my parents."

The robot walked around to Roger and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, "Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!"

The robot walked around to Marsha and slapped her out of her chair!

excellent!

Ask and ye shall recieve

A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.

When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. So he knocked on the door to clarify the point.

The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note asking me to leave 25 gallons of milk. Did you mean 2.5 gallons?"

The blonde said, "No, I want 25 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again."

The milkman asked, "Do you want it pasteurized?"

The blonde said, "No, just up to my tits. I can splash it on my eyes."

Just what I needed!..ain't even got to the second one

maybe some of this is funny-

Wash/grease boy is at daytona. Somebody has to grease and wash the truck.

Pulled some weeds in the back gardens, mulched the area.

Pick up dog poop in the backyard, mow the lawn.

Just finished watching the race. Take a shower. Coffee break and then a nap.

Taking the Mrs. out to dinner later.

Sorry, not much funny here.

I caught the end of the race too. Never went to a race at Daytona,but I did stop by just to check it out and caught a test session going on one time, back in the 80's or early 90's. My wife and I used to go to every race at Charlotte,Richmond,Martinsville,and Rockingham from the early 80's to mid 90's. Haven't been to one since.

Dog poop...yeah,not much funny there.

After lying awake all night listening to the 50mph wind shaking the entire house....got up and researched impact wrenches...the cheapo Chicago Pnuematic I have had for thirty years doesn't have enough torque to get out of its own way, so it is time to upgrade. Went to Sears and got one that has 750 ftlbs of torque...that oughtta get them lug nuts off after breaking loose! I have a nasty whole truck shake between 39 and 42 mph...gonna swap the wheels around and see if that helps, but it is just too windy to go outside today!

You want something funny eh?

A fish swimming in a lake bumps into a wall, what does he say?

Damn!

That's good-took me a while to get it!..but as they say,i'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

I got up about 7:00 a.m. called my mom to see if she needed anything,washed my pickup truck, carried my dress shirts and pants to the dry cleaners, came home and gutted the passenger door on the Mack. Now it's just a shell, still on the hinges. I bet I climbed in and out of the Mack a thousand times to get it apart. Took pictures of it. Then called the g/f to find she is sick. So i'm at her house on the computer. Put mine and her cloths in the washer and now waiting for it to shut off so I can put them in the dryer and start another load. I'm just thankful i'm not hurting in the back or shoulders today or I would be home laying in the easy chair watching TV or doing what I do most is, looking at my John and Martha King DVD's or my Sporty's DVD's. Rob will probably know what i'm talking about since it has to do with aircraft. I have to stay up on the learning curve so I can keep current with flying.

Tom, what time is supper? i'm getting very hungry thinking about BBQ. I need a reason to us the special sauce. I'm tired of peanut butter and hot sauce. I need something else to put hot sauce on. I saw some road kill coming over to the g/f house but, some buzzards had claimed it first. They were hungrier than I was then so I let them have it. Hmmm....wonder what buzzard would taste like with the special sauce?

mike

Anything's probably good with enough sauce on it. Jo tells me the story (about 3 times a week) about where she used to work(Biscuitville),where one day a week they'd bring something in for lunch just to get away from biscuits. She would usually bring something like green beans and potatoes, or macaroni and cheese, hamburgers,or bread. One day one of her co-workers brought pig ears. Jo said "it doesn't taste like anything". The other woman said "put some hot sauce on it"..."it still doesn't taste like anything"..."well,put some more hot sauce on it".

...eh? Must be why nobody's said anything funny today. I got my running done this morning,got ribs on the grill now. I check in periodically for funny stuff,but apparently Rob,Rhasler,Randy,Mark,and Hat City are also pursuing other endeavors. So much for today's entertainment.

Tom, Is that just one chain run through 2 D rings on that trailer. I'm surprised DOT didn't say something about that when you went through Efland. They were thick as flys on shit there last week looking for anyone running around the scales on 70. Give me a call when you run through this area and I'll buy you a cup of coffee. 919-932-3344. David

Yep,that's one chain. I was gonna put a chain through each one and pull it to the side,but that's the way they said to chain them. They even had a picture they showed you showing how to run the chains, so that's what I did.

Appreciate the offer there too! Don't be surprised if you get a call some night!

Went to Houston again this week. Last time there was snow and ice, this time I had the AC on. Brought these military trailers back from Sealy, Tx. to Butner, N.C. Really nice folks at the National Guard armory in Butner- they helped me unchain the load and brought the chains and binders to me while I hung them on the headache rack.

Then when I got to Petersburg to load I got my window cleaner and a paper towel and started cleaning this trailer-it's a carbon trailer.

I stand by the previous statement-"if it ain't green,it ain't a Euclid"...George Krylon,1832.

"John Henry Rudolph Behr was a dick"...George Krylon III,1908.

"If I owned General Motors,I would make huge off road trucks,call them Euclids,put only Detroit Diesel engines in them,and paint everything lime green"...Sherwin Williams,1763.

See,I know my history too.

I had a picture of a red Euclid I saw in Ohio,but I must have deleted it.Looked odd to see one that wasn't green,as that was the only one i've ever seen that wasn't.

well waddya know- it's old news now, but I found that red Euclid picture.

I was looking around for midget clown porn and found this site purely by accident. Lots of truck pictures and interesting stuff here-

http://www.roadtransport.com/blogs/big-lorry-blog/

Seems Rob was right,everybody's having a birthday this year. Have a good one Barry!

I agree,farming has always been an inherantly dangerous business,i for one am glad to see all the safety features added in recent years,if people would JUST USE THEM! be a lot less accidents! I have a treasured picture of my grandfather,sitting on his Oliver 88 with a borrowed "cornpicker" attachment in place,he's holding up his hands to show he still has all of his fingers at the end of the season! I dont know for sure how many times he turned over a tractor,but lived to be 87 years old,which was quite an accomplishment for a life-long farmer!...............Mark

I was driving-well,steering anyway- a Farmall C tractor before I even started school. All I had to do was drive between 2 rows of hay bales while Dad and my grandfather loaded the wagon,then Dad would jump on at the end of the field and get me pointed back up between the next 2 rows.

So being around tractors and farm equipment all my life,I knew how dangerous it could be.But my last year of high school I only had 2 classes in the morning,then i'd go home and help daddy on the farm. I was picking corn one day,had a mounted cornpicker on a 5000 Ford tractor. There was a set of rollers that went up behind you and a fan-the rollers shucked the corn, most of it that is, and the fan would blow the shucks off to the side. A corn picker is very dangerous, there are many things that can grab you, and I knew to always turn it off before you do anything. So I knew better than to reach behind me and clear the shucks away that had packed up in the chute with it running but I did it anyway. Something caught the end of the sleeve of my jacket-and pulled the whole sleeve off. If it had been a better jacket that the sleeve didn't come off of it would have been disastrous. It scared the hell out of me. I took what was left of the jacket way down in the woods and threw it away and never told anyone.

A teacher in a Detroit , Michigan elementary school asked her students if they could tell the class what sound a pig makes.

Little Tyrone stood up and said:

"Up against the wall mother fucker!"

I guess there's not to many farms in Detroit ... ...

they keep getting better-slightly-but that's funny right there!

I took mine with me and Spot and brother in law to cabin for a lil cooking and eating session and it was very tasty, excellent flavor with a good bite. I mean GOOD BITE! Its hot but thas the way I like it,,,Good Job Tom!!! randyp

Thank you very much indeed!

I haven't heard it in years, but there is a song about that called, Long Haired Big Tittied Bubble Headed Girl, I would like to hear it again, instead of just singing it to myself at times. That is if anybody can find it.

I remember that song,I had a tape with that song,and one called "Damned DOT" I think. Seems to me it was Jake Brake and the All Trucker Band-might be on youtube or something.

While thumbing through some tractor porn the other day, I noticed they brought back the 8n... So if you've ever wondered what they'd look like 60 years later, here ya go...

http://www.tractorhouse.com/listingsdetail/detail.aspx?OHID=5620443&

That's the "Boomer", a 50hp. tractor. I've seen a few sitting on dealer's lots.

When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend.

When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion, so I

decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.

In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional.

Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time

and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was

totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became

so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with

her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything.

She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy.

She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So

I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.

When I turned 31, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted

firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she

divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am older and wiser now, and am looking for a girl with big tits.

your best one so far!

yep,that's them. Good lookin' Pete there too!

Congratulations to you and your son,that's a fine truck you got him. Here's a few pictures of H-61s that I took at truck shows in N.C.

I can see it now...

It's not the fancy pants Vortox....the other brand, the name of which is eluding me at the moment... Anyhow, mine are the big ones-15", my brother's are the smaller ones-13". Filters for his are noticably cheaper than mine...dammit. I wanna say it cost me over a Benjamin when I replaced both filters a few months ago.

"guess i'll have the biggun's then"...Karl Childers

What about the oil bath filters ran on the B Models, does anyone feel that this was good and should stay with that set-up? I cannot remove a filter from its housing on my B and have to clean it by back flushing with a cleaner, let it dry and install with oil up to it's designated mark on the housing. I like this system because I feel it helps lubricate the valves in the upper part of my engine. I have not seen any large debris when I flushed the system last year for the first time since i've owned the truck since Sept. 2008.

mike

I have the same type filter and I didn't really know how to clean it. I took the bottom off and ran a stick up around edges as far as I could reach and drug out all sorts of crap-probably hadn't been cleaned for years.

Wow!..Hope your birthday is a happy one whatever you decide to do.

I've gotta renew my license this year too. I went to Altavista to the DMV this morning but they're almost as bad as the post office-the post office is only open from 8 to 10 on Saturday,found out the DMV is now closed on Saturday. Got 'til April to renew though.

I do have to take the vision test,so Vision i'd appreciate it if you'd send me all your personal information,family history,photos,etc. so I can study up on you.

This looks way better than my hot sauce.