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randyp

BMT Benefactor
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Everything posted by randyp

  1. randyp

    I hear you

    heh heh,,,cant beat it with a stick,,HEARING AIDS AND VIAGRA,,great inventions! randyp
  2. All truly and honestly, when he made the offer of the boot up my ass, and I hit the brakes, and got out,,,,honestly, I figured I had prolly let my mouth and temper buy me a goood asswhooping. I wasnt sure what my next move would be, other than bury my boot in his testicles. Just one of those moments, lil voice said "Randy, is you crazy?" But, i was committed, and the big dumb bastard just took off walking. Huh! I guess I bluffed him. I dont weigh much, and i aint much of a imposing looking feller, whew, glad that bluff worked. (glad I had my super sharp benchmade knife too) randyp
  3. randyp

    I hear you

    I sure like mine David. Im hearing birds and things that I guess i been missing for years. Dern things sure were pricey, but worth it cause they do work good. Technology is amazing. I did have to tell my wife she must be at that mystery frequency, cause shes still not coming through clearly,,,LOL,,,randyp
  4. Male squirrels chew the testicles off of newborn baby squirrels to cut down on competition, when their momma is out of the nest. Im prolly gonna draw the line right there though. He prolly wouldnt hold still long enough for that though, I sure wouldnt. randyp
  5. Good, hope all continues to go well. randyp
  6. Dernit Tom, He pushed me in the ditch and stole my truck! randyp
  7. I cant do that Olive,,that would be classed as porn, internet porn, prolly painfull internet porn. Sides all that, he had big feet to go with his big thumbs. randyp
  8. ?? aww,,come on Mike, just spit it out, les hear it. randyp
  9. big trucks-379 pete,(Im so ashamed),,,little trucks-old dodge power wagons,,,even littler trucks-tonka,,,even littler littler trucks-Hot Wheels,,,Now There, I said it! My first pick is Mack though. Maybe its just me, I havent found anything to compete with R model dump trucks, most specially offroad work. Both mine are kinda slow on highway, but you can just load the doodoo out of them and they will move it out, no jerking, no jumping, just take off. Dern, I likes em! randyp
  10. Same back at you Vlad, my komrade,,,,,,,,,,randyp
  11. Sorry to pop your bubble Vinster, but real trucks do have 2 sticks, and its okay if theyre bent too.. randyp
  12. heh heh,,,I may get nekkid, sit on the porch, and twiddle my thumbs,,,well,,,thumb,,,(wink, wink) randyp
  13. heh heh,,,My wife is always telling me Im all thumbs,,,(chest out now) That must be it. (chest really out now) (rubbing crotch,,,er,,,thumbs) randyp
  14. randyp

    I hear you

    I hid it from her Jim, now I can bust a nut at the push of a lil remote button. randyp
  15. randyp

    I hear you

    I isnt worried bout aliens Olive,,,,since being I am the head poo-bah of the grand official order of the alien dragon, of wich very soon I and my compatriot insectesoids will rule all of this pitiful planet. I actually communicate with mother planet with these. on another note, i have eaten so many ribs, brauts, hot dogs,,,I may never walk again. randyp
  16. I got fire cranked up, ribs on, just got me a bowl of ice cream and poured some beer over it,,,,have a happy one everybody! randyp
  17. I got all custom fitted for the latest state of the art micro-nuclear digitized hearing aids, a pair of em, at my wifes insistence, she paid for em. They came in yesterday, doctor hooked me up to his lil computer and tuned them all up. I did not know this freaking world was so noisy! They are outstanding! She even went the extra dollars and got the "Zen" program and remote for them, the zen is a soft, pleasing, sound that you can turn on or off. She axed me what the zen sounded like, I told her it sounded like an orgasm felt, I had to put hands over my ears and run fore she stold my hearing aids. You need to get that cough looked at Other Dog, I can hear you down here. randyp
  18. An old stove sitting in back yard may be better decor than an old lady sitting in back yard,,,heh heh,,just kidding,,wouldnt trade mine for ,,uh,,,well,,,ummm,,,nuttin! randyp
  19. Dern Rob, I had no idea they would be that cheap! I guess I better get on it,,thanks,,randyp
  20. 86 R-model got stopped for a DOT inspection before I left for Scout camp. I had a driver in it. Trooper said he smelled alcohol on the driver and gave him a breath-a lizer test. He showed .036. He told trooper he had only drank the night before. You are not allowed any content at all. He said he was out of service for 24 hrs and had him park truck. I went to get truck and pick him up, and canned his silly ass as i drove him home. He told me what he did on his time at night was his business,,,i agreed and told him what he did on his time was his bidness, but when it spilled over into my bidness, then it was my bidness. Trooper also said truck had to have windshield replaced because of cracks, 3 or 4 rock chips. Well, thas gonna be costly! Trooper said truck wasnt "out of service", but he was gonna watch for it and give me a lil time to replace glass. oh well,,,,bullshit,,,guess I better do it now,,,,randyp (driver got a lil wormy with me on way to his house, made a reference that I oughta pull over and he would put a boot up my ass,,,heh heh,,i nearly threw him through windshield shutting my ole dodge down, got out and said hell,,,les just have a go then you dumb bastard, he just took off walking down road on his way home and thas where i left him,,,goofy bastard)
  21. My personal favorite rub is Adkins western style barbecue seasoning. Its a dry, red rub, available at Brookshires. It comes in a big plastic bag. I rub them down liberally the night before, cover with foil and put in fridge. I put them on grill next day, indirect heat, cook em, and get em all over my jowls and shirt when i scarf them down. I generally bite anyone who gets close, and trys to sneak summa my ribs. randyp
  22. Hmm,,the barrels look bent on a coupla of em,,,,randyp
  23. randyp

    Rob:

    Ah---hah! Yall can all fall for this, Rob is under my alien command. The brainwashing is complete. I control all his thoughts and actions from central alien command. heh heh,,the human olivetroad is next. Soon, very soon, I will control all of Big mack trucks. We plan to use Macks to transport all our supplies and teleporter equipment, very soon, we will be bringing the rest of our alien insectesoid brothers,,,,SUFFER HUMANS SUFFER!!!!!! randyp
  24. Double barrell 12 gauge, ten dimes in each barrell,,,,,,,right after you blast him,,,"Keep the change, Bob." randyp
  25. Im glad I was raised on the ground floor, all I did was roll in the dirt and get back up. That is a terrible thing to have happened though. randyp
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